Barb's Space

Observations about life, family, church...anything else that is on my mind from the perspective that God rules, no matter what

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Location: Indianapolis, IN, United States

I am a 65 year young woman who has changed much in the last few years. I'm single again. I changed jobs twice (learned new skills), had a serious stroke in 2008, "retired" and after getting better started taking up new interests, and am continuing to get more fit. Some things have matured. I've enjoyed watching my three guys grow into men I respect and am proud of. One waited 11 years to have his first birth child. Today I'm a grandma of six (four boys and 2 girls between two families)! I have learned to love Jesus even more, and I have regained my sense of adventure. Someone said, "The best is yet to be."--I believe it, if I keep an open mind and heart and keep growing and walking with God.

Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Snow Daze

Hi, Everybody! Long time no write. I have my wish--I'm snowed in. This is something I've longed for for at least two years. I am now in my second day in a row of "snowed in-ness" (that's the state of being snowed in, for those of you who need a translation), and it's got to be better than my first.

I decided yesterday, my first snow day (not knowing I was going to have a second day), was going to be my "Waterloo." I was going to meet my match. You see, I had these spreadsheets to do for work, and I didn't even know how to change from one year to the next on the forms without changing the formulas. I must have been in a "snow daze," because it took me five hours to learn that and how to add categories with calculations intact. (I'm not a math or spreadsheet person, by nature--my kids once said to me, "Mom, everything you do tastes like English." --There you have it!) I even had to have my son walk me through some of it. Micah was very patient. Why I didn't ask him earlier, I don't know--maybe I didn't want to admit how slow I was in this area. There is something about wanting to do enough things well so that your kids admire you instead of being tempted to snicker...but that's a subject [maybe] for another day... . (Why, you ask, did I deal with spreadsheets at work for two years without knowing what I was doing? Legitimate question. I just in the last month or so got the equipment that would enable me to practice at home... .)

Anyway, after I got the work accomplished, I promptly lost my victory in self-pitying martyrdom; after all, I had "wasted" a perfectly good snow day. Why couldn't I think I had "invested" it in becoming more valuable to my employer? But I didn't think that way, and I got grouchy enough so that when a friend called, my grouchiness was noticed. --Yes, I apologized and explained. Then I got a call and heard that we would be closed again today...so all my disappointment about "wasting my snow day" was for nothing.

Now, after a great night's sleep (the night before I had woken up periodically and ended up on the couch with blinds open watching the snow and dozing fitfully in my excitement), am I sitting here feeling peaceful? accomplished? content? No, I'm feeling restless, bored, and wondering about what the snow days will do to my financial bottom line, among other things. That could be called "worry." The point is, there is always something around to spoil my good time if I let it.

So...by God's grace, I'm choosing. I'm choosing to read the Bible, talk to God about my concerns, be thankful that I have everything I need for today, including a second snow day, heat, light, computer, my blog to write on... and I'm going to be happy, and let God be concerned about tomorrow. He's very good at that. I just finished reading the book of Job in The Message bible. Very good and to the point. I'm also going to pray for those in New Orleans who are going through a second (or first) round of losing everything in less than two years, the homeless, those without heat, those in war-torn countries, those who have lost loved ones to war or illness or old age, those who don't know Jesus. I choose to be thankful, mindful of God, and prayerful. ...You know what? My mood is changing. I feel better already.

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