Barb's Space

Observations about life, family, church...anything else that is on my mind from the perspective that God rules, no matter what

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Location: Indianapolis, IN, United States

I am a 65 year young woman who has changed much in the last few years. I'm single again. I changed jobs twice (learned new skills), had a serious stroke in 2008, "retired" and after getting better started taking up new interests, and am continuing to get more fit. Some things have matured. I've enjoyed watching my three guys grow into men I respect and am proud of. One waited 11 years to have his first birth child. Today I'm a grandma of six (four boys and 2 girls between two families)! I have learned to love Jesus even more, and I have regained my sense of adventure. Someone said, "The best is yet to be."--I believe it, if I keep an open mind and heart and keep growing and walking with God.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Health Update

Hi, everybody. In two days it will be a year since I had the stroke. I wanted to give a progress update. It seems I have improved somewhat, though from day to day that can be subjective. I am so glad I can speak, though it is still not easy, and that though I still have no real appetite, I can maintain my weight between 130-135 pounds. I am walking several days a week from a mile and a quarter to a mile and a half or so and lift weights two to three times a week, though by the time I finish either activity I am exhausted. Cooking is still very hard, and though I can do dishes, I don't do well. Laundry is still hard, but possible. I just found out about three weeks ago that I can ride an escalator like I used to without thinking about it, and can shower easily again. Brushing teeth and eating still take concentration, though I think they are taking less concentration than they did for a while. On some days typing is easier than before, though it is not yet simple. Concerning driving, I am still driving to church and short distances from home only.

Concerning my emotional and spiritual health, I am trying to move on. I am in counseling at my church, and that is helping some. I had never dealt with some of the issues raised when my marriage ended, and we've been dealing with that, and I am also dealing with who God made me to be--issues needing consideration to be able to move forward in my life. In addition, I am revisiting another issue that is very important to me, and that is divine supernatural healing. I believe God does it with all my heart and have experienced it quite often, but I am sad that I am not walking in it right now and feel I am letting God down even though that doesn't change His love for me. I think part of the good to come out of this stroke will be some new understandings only God can give me. I am also once again realizing the old adage that you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink. I can't just receive what someone else says. I can (and need to) consider it, but I'm desperate for the Lord to speak to my heart. It seems those are the only things I really have been able to hold onto in my life.--Another thiing-it's very hard to feel close to God with all of this going on, but I want to get there again. I hear His voice in some areas again, but I long for more.

I am still not working--not enough stamina yet, but I am hoping with my walking and weights to build more. I am still going day by day financially, and will see what God does. He has been providing till now, and I'm very thankful.

Well, I guess that's all for now...more later as I know it.

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