Church Alive!

As I've looked over my past work I have realized something. The church I started going to this winter really does what I write about in my articles about the body of Christ. They have the right attitudes, are listening to God, learning how to study the Bible, working on getting healed and being more and more a community of faith. They have outreaches to the poor and are serious about God.

I thought that would make us ready for what is ahead. It is making us ready, but it doesn't look like I envisioned it would. That's okay--we still have a little more work to go. But I don't think it will ever look like I think it will. God always has something different and deeper in mind than I do, and if it goes according to His plan as opposed to mine, it will be great.

Now not everyone in this church is in the same place spiritually. That's true in all churches. If we were all at the same maturity level, it wouldn't be good. We will be at different places of growth. But we all need to be growing. Right now we are being challenged not to come to church if we don't enjoy it--we shouldn't come out of duty. We are also being challenged to come early enough to get in on the beginning of worship because God deserves our all. It has also been suggested that our worship start before we come so we are ready to present ourselves corporately before our God. God is raising the bar, and what He is saying can be done by people at different levels of maturity.

My entrance into things at this church is from a different angle. I can only participate so much since I can't sing well since the stroke and I haven't been able to talk much. But even in my condition I've found the worship really helps me draw nearer to God and I am beginning to be able to open slowly back up to Him. I am finding my hands raise a little higher each meeting, especially since a friend told me God really had missed my worship. I also just started going to a before church Bible study yesterday. It really surprised me because of its depth--and the desire for it to remain very practical. Also I've started getting some healing for things God has shown me during this stroke--things that were there before, but that I was busy enough to ignore.

Their desire at this church is for people to participate in worship, service, community or any aspect of things because they want to. They do not believe in abusing the people who come. I believe God will honor this kind of church and that the rest of what is needed will be added unto us as we keep looking at Him.

I pray Father, that this church keep growing according to your plan, and that we become all that You want us to be. I also pray for those who aren't in a church with these characteristics and want to be that You help them find one. I love you, Lord. In Jesus' name and for His sake I pray. Amen

Reviewing the Past

Today I want to talk about the past. One way I'll get to the future is by looking at where I've been. I have been rereading my blog articles lately, and know that where I am today is partly seen in what I've been writing about. I am being tested as to whether I believe what I feel God inspired me to write.

I found myself saying a loud resounding "yes" to these articles again. After all, they are as much for me as for anyone else. I do believe the right kind of wasted worship is the only way for me to go. I do believe what I said in the articles on God saying, "I Will Build My Church." I believe the things I wrote in "Hearing God's Voice--What's Stopping Me?" and all the other articles. Even the articles that I don't believe were specifically inspired I believe.

That is integrity. If I didn't still believe these things, I would need to remove them. Now though, I need to see how they apply after the stroke. I have also written some other things on a web page, things I need to go over. I wrote about an auto accident in 1983 and how it affected my life. I needed to go back there because it speaks of what I can learn during severe physical trials. You can find it at http://www.geocities.com/skywatch5/1983mystory.html if you want to read it. Just copy the address and paste it in the window and go. That and some poems are found in the section called "Suffering's Challenge." It also helped me to go to the poems and read "Wonderings" and "Learning to Yield."

The other night in the middle of the night, God was there when I woke up. I've been thinking a lot about my future in the last couple weeks especially. I feel like He just showed me an attitude that needs to change. He showed me how I thought about something that I have always gotten around through ignoring it. Now I'm hearing Him say I have to get to the bottom of it. It's time to confess and forsake it. I'm hearing that as I do, my future can be better than my past.

As I look ahead, I am also being told to look at my giftings and ask how they can be used to best advantage. You see, another thing I believe is that work-wise we should do what we were made for. I have not been doing that. I have been working where I have because that's what God gave me to do for those seasons, but I feel now is the time to really examine this area since I can't do much right now. I am asking where God wants to take me and how He wants to get me there.

All of this is one way of saying what a serious crisis can do for and in your life. I know I am going to learn a lot more in the days to come as I keep asking, seeking and knocking. Feel free to come along.

Tests and Trials - Part 2

The stroke I had last summer has touched many areas of my life. I was so out of it that it took a friend of mine to point this out to me. It has touched my physical health, my emotional health, my financial health and my spiritual health.

As I said last time, I lost my job. I am getting ready to consider what I can be trained to do now. My thoughts were not clear in the beginning, but I am now gaining clarity and can hold my thoughts for a while. However, with my speech still in flux and so much trouble typing, things are hard. (One thing I thought I heard even before the stroke was the Lord saying the enemy was going to try to take my voice. I didn't know that was literal.) Also, learning is not as quick as it was. We will see what happens--and did I mention there seems to be a dearth of jobs right now?

This is also a financial battle for me. When I was working for A Hearing Service and Omega Retirement Plans during the last seven years, I saved as much money as I could. I had never had a chance to save before and now I was doing it. Even though I have a gift for saving, I could only save so much, and couldn't save enough. The hospital wrote off my bill, which I could not have paid, and some of the doctors did as well. Other bills were scaled down. I had thought I was saving for retirement... . I have had to go on disability for now. It started six months after the stroke. I also was able to get on the Healthy Indiana Program which helps when you have no health insurance. (I have never had a job with health insurance.) Right now I need these things, and I am grateful, though I would like to get past this. I really don't want to be tied to the system for healthcare and provision.

I'm having an emotional battle because I feel useless with no quick turnaround in sight. I felt depressed for months, but that has lifted a little as I've started reading counseling books and writing on here and Facebook, and have started praying and listening to God a little more. It helps some when I'm listening even if He isn't talking.

The spiritual battle is to totally yield to God in this situation. It's hard to yield when you are angry and have many questions. Another part of my spiritual battle involves some things I said yes to the Lord about a year ago January. It seems that those things have completely evaporated. I wonder what my future holds, what I can do for the next stage of my life. I believe God still has something for me or I wouldn't be thinking He might but it's a challenge just waiting.

I am working on what it means to trust God again when I have nothing I am doing for Him or for myself. I don't feel very capable right now, but He says His love is not based on my worthiness. I am getting another lesson in being loved by my Father, and will let you know more as I learn.

Tests and Trials - Part 1

Hi, everyone. It has been over a year since I have written, though several things are in draft form. I had thought to write more, but life has a way of intruding. I got in touch with a group of people from the past last spring, and talked with them for a few months. That took all my energy and didn't turn out as I'd hoped. It was worth trying, however.

Then I went from the frying pan into the fire. On July 29, 2008, five days after my 57th birthday, I had a stroke. It was in the top left side of the brain, and because it was in a somewhat unusual place some of the things I'm having to recover from are unusual also.

At first I was emotionally numb, and then I got very angry at God. This wasn't supposed to happen. One of the fears I've had for some time was that since I was divorced in December 2004, I wondered what would happen to me if I was alone and something happened. I kept fighting the fear, but it still stayed. Well I was alone and something did happen, yet I survived. I was in the hospital for five days, then went to the home of some friends who used to go to the church I went to. I stayed with them for six weeks--long enough to get stabilized and to start dealing with the high blood pressure I'd been trying to deal with naturally for years and diabetes I also learned of in the hospital. (Diabetes is now being totally controlled by diet.) I was there also long enough to begin to deal with the stroke's effects.

I didn't know it can take up to two years for a person to recover as much as possible from a stroke. It has been almost seven and a half months now. For all this time I have been working to go from not being able to speak to where my speech therapist says I have "voicing" with the proper pitch for my voice 65% of the time. At times I still speak in a whispery, hoarse voice. When I do speak, my words are usually very clear, however I speak. As far as singing goes, I never had a great voice, but it is much worse now.

Other areas I'm dealing with include typing and driving. My fingers on my right hand don't want to cooperate, and it takes me a long time to type. In my speech and typing the word being used is aphasia. Driving is also hard. My eyes are more sensitive to light (need sunglasses most of the time) and I have another challenge as well--being mindful of what's happening all around me. I'm working on that one also.

All of this means that though I score high enough on intelligence, I can't work right now. The lady who did my job before I did came back from August through mid-December. I couldn't remember in November how to do my job. The owner very kindly kept my job that long for me, but when I couldn't relearn it fast enough, someone else had to be hired.

This means I spend many quiet days at home. I read. For a time all I read was Christian fiction. I watch some movies. Some friends come over and take me out as they can. More often now I pray and try to listen to God. It gets easier as I get less angry. I just started reading books like Competent Christian Counseling by Tim Cllnton--a 700-some page book I've been wanting to read for a long time. Now I'm on Crisis and Trauma Counseling by Norman Wright.

In October, two of my children moved me into their apartment complex so it would be easier for them to help me with rides to the dr, the grocery, etc. This meant changing churches. It's a challenge getting to know people in church (or in the apartments) when it is hard to talk. But I like the worship here--it has been helping me get closer to God again.

There is more to share about the effects this is having on my life, but not today. Talk to you all later.

God is Calling Us...

This is the note before the article. Yes, I am still working on my series, Relationships: By the Book Part 3 (NT2), but all my writing came to an abrupt halt as the thoughts below began to fill my mind. So I needed to "follow my nose" or the "wind of the Spirit" and go in this direction first. I pray God bless this to you, and I encourage you to feel free to comment. –

Why do I encourage you to comment here and on any article? I believe that dialogue in the Body of Christ, sharing our struggles and thoughts and questions and respectfully and prayerfully listening to one another can help us grow more quickly. ... Is anyone up for an adventure to find out? (You could even comment on other comments so long as it's done with respect and the intent to learn and grow...).

God is calling us, but what is He calling us to? As I listen to His heartbeat, I hear a message that is "coming back around” in the church. I first heard it some 30 years ago...and I agreed and said, "Yes, Lord." But what I didn't know was that in my "yes" so long ago, I was inviting my loving Father God to show me I was incapable of doing it in a way that pleased Him till He changed me.

These many years later, I am hearing the call again. In fact, I was reading a Christian website a couple years ago, and the input by various people said ahead of time that God was going to bring the message back. Now mind you, I am not sorry for this message or for my continued "yes," but do you know what my response was when I first heard it was coming back? Spiritual person that I am, my first response was, "Oh, no!" (Yes, I know--when I shared that with my pastor, who is being led to share the message on a continuing basis with our church now, he was as surprised at my reaction as you probably are.) The truth is that message brought much turmoil into the Body of Christ. (In the years since I heard it the first time, I learned that what I thought had been a local phenomenon had been preached in places all over the country--just as is happening now. The turmoil from the message was also nearly identical in any place I know of where the message had been proclaimed.)

What caused the turmoil? I believe we (logically) thought we could actually do what God was asking. I believe even ministry thought it could produce (or felt it was their responsibility to produce) the fruit of that word in the Body. But, as I've learned in the ensuing years, and as I wrote to a minister recently, "Ministry is called to preach its way into a corner that it cannot get out of except God Himself fulfill the Word He had you preach." Likewise, for us to think we can live the things God is speaking is unrealistic. Why? Because we have been so tainted by "sin's paintbrush" from the fall right on into today that on our own we cannot think or perceive or do anything the way God intends.

That is why it is so very important that we listen to how God wants us to receive and apply what we are hearing. We must realize we are incapable of applying it in and of ourselves. The principle of us trying to apply what God says is spoken to in Mark 3:23b-24 (just substitute the word "self" or "flesh" for "devil" or "Satan") where Jesus says, "Does it make sense to send a devil to catch a devil, to use Satan to get rid of Satan? A constantly squabbling family disintegrates." (from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved.) I believe we were even warned about that years ago, but for the most part neither leaders nor people knew how to avoid the traps Satan was laying against that powerful message.

What is God's antidote to this message once again being preached going awry? I believe there are some things in place in the body of Christ today that weren't there years ago, things that will "make the message go right" this time if we take the time to meditate, talk and listen to Father God and learn what they mean instead of merely giving them lip-service. Let me also add that the fact that they were not there 30 years ago was not an oversight on God's part. I believe God has been maturing the Body of Christ as fast as possible, and that we needed to go through the maturing those experiences brought to get us where we are today. The message that will counteract the poison Satan tries to inject to cause the message to twist is the knowledge (let me emphasize - it is not the "head knowledge" but rather the "heart knowledge") of God our Father's love for us. As author S. J. Hill (mentioned below) says (my paraphrase), human beings are wired to long for and respond from the heart to His love.

So what is the "dangerous" God-inspired message that was spoken some 30 years ago and is now being proclaimed again? The message is that of "surrender to Christ," or "dying or death to self." It is probably also called other things like "total consecration or sanctification" depending on where you hear it.

Surrender of our lives must begin with surrender of our hearts. It cannot be done rightly from mental assent or "in the flesh." It can only be done as we intimately experience Father's love for us. Once that is firmly established in our lives as a reality, then our love for God is a response to and a reflection of His love for us. That is the climate in which our surrender must be given.

That climate will also cause us to understand the "fellowship of Christ's sufferings" (Phil 3:10) correctly. For too many years, I thought that meant merely "dying to self," or surrendering my wants and desires. That is part of it, but if that is all it entails, it leaves a void that can too readily be filled the wrong way, with self-righteous pride and a judgmental attitude among other things. If we stop there, we are left with religion.

In our body, we are just finishing a serious 21-day "fast as you are led." We set up a blog for back-and-forth feedback, with regular postings by our pastor and room for our comments. Here's what I was meditating on and led to share regarding "the fellowship of [Christ's] sufferings"—I generally have understood that to mean [firstly] the issue of dying to self and [secondly] the pain Jesus felt on earth among an unholy people [because He was so enamored of His Father and His ways, but]... the Lord is bringing me face to face with something even deeper. The fellowship of His sufferings was not only His own pains that He experienced in following God, but also the pain of sinful humanity’s sufferings.

In other words, the other very real suffering Jesus experienced was in His being willing to be Emmanuel, God-with-us enough to feel our brokenness. That is quite different from the "death to self" we experience. It is having that issue settled and being willing to take on with the Lord the pains of those others who are not reconciled with Him... . It is only as I [pass through the first two realms-of dying to self and becoming very disquieted with sin because of my closeness to Father God and] become willing to bear the pains of separated humanity with Jesus (not for Him), that [I] will demonstrate His character and the authenticity of the message of the good news…because as He is so are we in this world (I Jn 4:17).

Friends, the only way we will navigate these waters successfully is as we "die to self" and "wholly surrender" out of responding to our Bridegroom's wooing. That is the only way our surrender won't turn into a sinful (yes, I said sinful) legalistic, religious exercise that is dry as toast and self-righteous to boot. That kind of surrender is not only damaging to us, but to those who encounter us. That kind of surrender takes both us and others further away from God. God, in calling for our surrender, is not wanting self-martyrdom--that is what false religions birth. We serve a living God who is not calling us to dry doctrine so that we end up like the Pharisees Jesus rebuked, but to heartfelt, living surrender that will result in His very life being lived through us.

Are we willing, as the Body of Christ to learn of our Father's love for us? Are we willing to get before Him and beg Him to teach us what we don't know and haven't experienced on a day-to-day basis even if we've been saved? Our love will not cut it. It was marred by the fall and continued sin; our love continues to keep us from knowing God’s love which is unconditional.

Today God is doing something precious. He is revealing His love for His bride, the Body of Christ. Let's take a look at some things He's sharing with us through leaders and others who have been walking with God through thick and thin for years. The following is just a sampling:

"It takes God to love God. It takes God to pursue God." That is from page 8 paragraph 5 (and it is expounded on page 122, paragraph 1) of S.J. Hill's book, Enjoying God: Experiencing Intimacy with the Heavenly Father (available among other places through Amazon.com). We love Him because He first loved us (1 John 4:19b). The author makes the point that there is certainly a place to pursue God with passion, but we must never forget (or stop coming to know and experience on an ever-deepening level) the love God has for us that elicits our response of love to Him. –There are treasures here that will help us, friends.

Then there's Kay Warren's (Rick Warren of Saddleback Church in CA is her husband) Dangerous Surrender: What Happens When You Say Yes to God. It was a very good, convicting book about why we totally surrender to God. In it, Kay shares the process God took her through (and her very honest reactions and responses in working through the process) to bring her to that third aspect of the fellowship of Christ's sufferings.

Another helpful book is Voices of the Faithful: Inspiring Stories of Courage from Christians Serving Around the World "with Beth Moore and friends who put their lives on the line for God." It is a book of 366 one-page "get real" devotions written by missionaries around the world. It again takes me back to the real meaning of surrender, the struggle with it even when we’ve received Father’s love for us, and the why of it.

For help in letting God grow us, my pastor found a gem: Anonymous, by Alicia Britt Chole, a former atheist--it is a small book with big concepts. It is not self-help or positive thinking, but what God can do in us during, and how He works with us in our winter seasons (or as some say, the “dark night of the soul”).

These are just a few of the materials out there that God is using to bring us further in real Christianity so we don't fall prey to the traps of religion. Are we willing to start or continue or pick up where we left off in the journey? Remember, the mercies of God are new every morning. Can you hear? God is calling us...

Relationships: By the Book - Part 2 (NT1)

In part one (OT) of Relationships: By the Book we took a very quick survey of God’s rocky relationship with His creatures. Actually, God didn’t have the hot/cold, on-again, off-again relationship—sin warped us and we went from being God-centered and considering others to being self-centered! From then on, for the most part, our mentality toward God became, “I’ll follow You as long as You do what I want,” or “I’ll obey and serve You as long as I can see the payoff.” Meanwhile, our mentality toward others became, as Cain said when God asked the whereabouts of his brother Abel, “Am I my brother’s keeper?”

Giving in to sin, we exchanged unconditional love—enjoying God and His creatures without any strings attached—for dysfunctional, manipulative, conditional love. In that exchange we also lost truth, trust which has its basis in truth, and openness. As the curtain closes on the Old Testament, God’s people had moved from rejection to giving Him “lip service”—outward obedience and inward rebellion. This resulted in pride, self-righteousness, and a legalistic “system” of religion, which took them even further away from real relationship with Him and each other, because it gave them the deceptive form of godliness while denying the power of right relationship with Him and His creatures.

This is where, after a 400 year silence from Malachi to Matthew, we see Jesus appear on the world’s stage. Creator and Father God could have given up on us; He could have destroyed us and started over. But instead, the Bible tells us (John 3:16) Father God still loved us unconditionally, so into this mess He sent Jesus, His very best—His very own Son who chose to come and leave the privileges of being God behind. While Jesus still was God by virtue of virgin birth, He became fully man, sinless man, but man who had to learn just as we do (Heb 2:10 & 5:8). He was born into that nation God started in Genesis with Abraham. He was the One God had intended from the very beginning Who would “make things right.”

Because He was the reconciler, the One to bring real, lasting peace (as opposed to peace at any price) between God and man and man and man (Mt 22:37-39), and because His life, death and resurrection ushered in the concept of the Body of Christ (Eph 1:3-11, 3:1-11, I Corin 12:12-14, Eph 4:11-16), Jesus was and is all about right relationships. He desires with all His being for us to relate in a healthy manner, first with the Trinity (Father God, Jesus Himself, and the Holy Spirit) and secondly, as a living outgrowth of that fellowship, with one another. Since that is His desire, it is very important to study His time on earth, for He is our example in these (as in all) matters (Jn 13:14-15).

To consider Jesus’ relationships with us humans, we must first look at His relationship with His Father God and the Holy Spirit, for again, it is only out of that vertical relationship that right relationships can happen between us on a horizontal, earthly level. Why? Because, as we saw in part one of Relationships: By the Book, sin immediately severed right relationship between God and us, and from there, sinfully distorted relationships from person to person.

What was Jesus’ relationship on earth like with Father God? Remember, if His pattern of relationships seems strange, it is because we have looked out of a distorted lens our whole lives. He alone knows what right relationships are. His ways are patterns for us. Thinking along those lines, He was always looking to His Father for direction as to what to say and do. Consider John 8:38: I speak what I have seen with My Father… NKJV, or as it says in The Message, I'm talking about things I have seen while keeping company with the Father - THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved and John 15:15 …all things that I heard from My Father I have made known to you. NKJV

What did Jesus do that caused Him to be in such close relationship with Father God? Matt 14:23 says, With the crowd dispersed, [Jesus] climbed the mountain so he could be by Himself and pray. He stayed there alone, late into the night. - from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved

Matt 26:36-39 Then Jesus went …to a garden called Gethsemane and told His disciples, "Stay here while I go over there and pray." …He plunged into an agonizing sorrow. Then He said, "This sorrow is crushing my life out. Stay here and keep vigil with Me." Going a little ahead, He fell on His face, praying, "My Father, if there is any way, get Me out of this. But please, not what I want. You, what do You want?" - from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved

Jesus prayed. He got alone with God whenever He needed to, and spoke plainly what was on His heart. Being honest with His feelings, He nonetheless chose to follow God, regardless of the cost to Himself. As the verses above indicate, He also listened. He “kept company” with His Father (Jn 8:38 The Message-above); this was not a religious exercise—this was a real connection born from a real relationship. When He heard, He went out and obeyed, then came back to His Father for more prayer and “grace to help in time of need.”

What was Jesus’ relationship with the Holy Spirit? His earthly life started with the Holy Spirit planting Him in Mary’s womb. The Bible says in Matt 1:20 ...Mary's pregnancy [Jesus] is Spirit-conceived. God's Holy Spirit has made her pregnant. - from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved

When Jesus was baptized by John the Baptist, it says in Luke 3:22, the Holy Spirit, like a dove descending, came down on Him. And along with the Spirit, a voice: "You are My Son, chosen and marked by My love, pride of My life." - from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved

Right after this, it says in Luke 4:1-2: Now Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, left the Jordan and was led by the Spirit into the wild. For forty wilderness days and nights He was tested… - from THE MESSAGE: The Bible in Contemporary Language © 2002 by Eugene H. Peterson. All rights reserved

This One who had a real connection with His Father, who prayed, who listened, who obeyed was empowered and enabled to obey by the Holy Spirit. Jesus was led by the Spirit into testing; He was led by the Spirit into and in His ministry—and He was led by the Spirit into and through the crucifixion. Jesus knew the other member of the Trinity intimately. In the book of Acts are many references to what part the Holy Spirit plays in our lives—Jesus knew Him intimately and relied on Him constantly. He did the same things for Jesus it says He will do for us.

The only way Jesus could have represented the heart of God powerfully enough both in word and deed to get past sinful man’s distortion of the God-breathed written Word was to seek the fellowship and direction of Father God and the Holy Spirit. Without that fellowship, since He left His God-privileges when He came to earth in bodily form, He would not have been able to live His life as the Father intended—as man’s “bridge” back to God. He wouldn’t have been able to preach Mt 5-7, the Sermon on the Mount, because that took delving deep into areas of men’s hearts. That sermon had the same power to divide soul from spirit and get to the thoughts and intents of the heart that Heb. 4:12-13 says the God-breathed, God-inspired written Word has. Both the written word and Jesus’ message were authored by the Holy Spirit.

There is more to say about our Lord and Master in the way of relationships, and that will be left for part 3 of Relationships: By the Book (NT2).

Relationships: By the Book - Part 1 (OT)

Because God is emphasizing relationships in the Body of Christ as a means to help us grow and change into His likeness, it is very important to know in even more detail what healthy relationships look like. (For more on the subject, see the series on worship that discusses proper relationship with God, and the articles on God building His church regarding the importance of right relationships with one another.) As an effort to explore this topic further, I am beginning a series on relationships, the first subject being an overview of relationships in the Bible (called By the Book). It amazes me that in the midst of a society (or world) with very unhealthy relationships--sometimes "just" co-dependent relationships, sometimes abusive relationships, and the whole spectrum in between--He chooses to redeem us from that milieu and say, "Now I want you to learn to play well together." Not only that, He uses something that can be a means of very real damage and destruction, turns it on its ear (or inside out) and says, "Folks, this can be redemptive; after all, I was the Author of relationships--just follow Me" (while to the world who hasn’t received Him He says, "Just watch!").

So how does God take relationships, which are so frequently unhealthy at best and destructive at worst and turn them inside out, making them part of His redemptive plan? Let’s go to the Book He left as His record and guide to examine a birds-eye-view of the history of relationships, and where God wants to take them. In our search, let's look at first things first. To do that, we must begin with the Old Testament, since that's where God began. In there is a book (Proverbs) with very practical “get along” principles. There was also the law—which began to give pictures through ritual and traditions and types (the wilderness tabernacle and its furnishings, the different offerings, and the laws, statutes and ordinances of Exodus, Leviticus and Numbers) of what kind of God we serve, and what kind of people we are. He was explicit about the fact that we all are “marred pottery” and “damaged goods,” but that we can be reclaimed.

Then there are stories of God’s relationships with people, His creation, before Jesus. Genesis tells of man’s fall into sin, and the struggles that resulted in relationships between God and us and between us humans. We see right away the hiding from God and one another, the denial of responsibility, and futher, the distortion of husband/wife relationships prophesied by God in Genesis 3 as being a consequence of sin, but not the pattern He originally intended for those relationships. Soon after follows the first murder and disavowal of responsibility for it and the murderer's sin in the relationship that prompted the murder (Gen 4:1-10). However, Genesis 3:14-15 is the first intimation that it will take a Person God sends to make this right…but there were “in the meantime” provisions even before the Law. God pulled a man/family out from relationship to a pagan nation to make a “new nation” to be in relationship with Himself, and demonstrate Himself through. He molded and trained them, and in doing so, began to reveal His ways-in-action as well as law.

In Deuteronomy and Joshua we see this nation stumbling and falling, but by God’s grace getting up again, learning more about relationship with this holy God and each other (see Joshua 6:15-21, 7:1-23) all the while. Judges tells us a historical story about what happened when this nation wanted nothing to do with a relationship with the God Who called them. It is a story of what happened when they “did what was right in their own eyes” making no pretense of following God—things got even more twisted and broken.

In the books of Samuel, Kings and Chronicles, we see what happened when the people chose not to be led directly by relationship with God but wanted a king. He gave them what they desired, but Saul was a co-dependent/unhealthy ruler at best. We see the results of that, then the results of David, the first godly ruler in the generational line that would produce Jesus. Continuing after David was his son Solomon. Israel rose to her greatest heights at this time. Her temple was finally built; even the rulers of the day came to hear and see the wonders of Israel and her ruler. But sin and trusting other-than-God were still at the heart of the nation. Solomon brought idolatry (relating to false gods) into Israel by marrying foreign wives who believed in false gods and propagated those beliefs throughout Israel.

Reading on, we see continued refusal of relationship and disobedience of leaders and people which led to captivity in Babylon, even after repeated warnings by prophets God sent... . It was interesting that as soon as the discipline happened, the prophets spoke encouraging words to the people about seeking [relationship with] God and seeking the welfare of the place where they were taken captive, giving hope through the promise of future restoration.

After 70 years was up (see the book of Daniel) it was time to seek God for the time of prophesied restoration. Even after captivity and during the process of restoration, (Ezra chapters 7-10), people were still refusing right relationship with Him by going against God's direction. After the captivity, people got smarter (or more devious)—they gave “lip service” to God, instead of out and out rebelling. Their thinking was to give Him what He wanted without giving their hearts. That is impossible, for a God Who wants relationship knows if they refuse to give their hearts, anything else they do is a sham. This resulted in self-righteousness and pride, and so we learn that law without heart or relationship is legalism. It turns on us and makes everything cold, twisted and distorted.

This is the context in which the Old Testament closes. Four hundred years later, the curtain again rises--on the New Testament dealings of God-with-us. In His continued dealings with His creation, we see that He will go to any lengths to bring His errant creation back into right relationship with Himself (which will also yield the possibility of right relationships between people). That is where we will pick up in part two of Relationships: By the Book.

"I Will Build My Church" - Part 3

Note: I find it interesting that I started this article as a draft in March of last year. But it wasn't time for it to be finished. Through the months I have watched God begin to work on this area in a deeper way than ever before--both in my life and in the lives of others around me. I am watching with awe as God continues to get us ready. For what? I believe He is getting us prepared to walk as a mature church. He's working to build us as "living stones" into a "glorious church without spot or wrinkle." His command, "Let the Bride make herself ready," has gone out. Are we responding?

As this series develops, it seems that it is a group of thoughts like a pre-flight checklist. I know many of us are eager to fly, but we are understandably not eager to crash.—Some of us have crashed before, or else we've seen others crash and we want no part of it. How have we responded to those fears? We have wanted God, even hungered for Him, but at the same time we have kept Him and our brothers and sisters at arm’s length because of pride, unresolved anger or fear.

To allow God to build His church in our midst, we must hear His heart. There is a call going out today for God’s people to become “real.” We have kept Him and others at a distance by “keeping our masks on,” by not letting others in enough to know what’s really going on in our lives—and let’s face it—things are harder than they used to be…or the trials simply have not ended like we think they should have. They are either longer in duration than they "ought to be" (by whose standard, ours or the Bible's??), or they have ended "badly." In other words, God has turned up the heat, and things are not looking pretty.

One school of thought regarding not letting others in is that we need to “keep God from looking bad.” That theory maintains that we are hurting His cause when we are open and honest about some of the trials He allows us to go through. The thinking goes something like, “If I let on how hard this is, how badly I’m hurting, or that I feel trapped or cornered, I make God look like He’s absent or doesn’t care or doesn’t keep His promises.”

The answer to this is that God will go to any lengths to work with His people. He is not at all concerned with His reputation in that area. He can defend Himself. No, He doesn’t want us taking praise for what He does, but neither do we have to defend His actions and dealings with us. As a parent, He can take the heat!

The flip side of making God look bad, is that we don’t want to look bad, and if we are real, that can happen. When I am real, I am not only sharing the hard times I am going through, but I am also risking you seeing how I am responding to those hard times (and let’s face it, sometimes the way I respond stinks!). Adverse circumstances, by their very nature are designed to show up, highlight my weaknesses and flaws so that I will give them to God for Him to work on them. But many times I am too close to myself to see my reactions—all I know in hard times is that I hurt. However, my brothers and sisters in Christ can very easily see my flaws—if I am real. I have to trust they will not judge me but will confront me if I need confronting in love, will encourage me if I need encouraging, and either way will always pray for me.

In adverse circumstances I also see and get tested regarding my attitudes about God. When I don’t understand Him (which is often) and why He allows certain things in my life, instead of drawing closer to receive more of Him, I tend to draw back. I don’t want to acknowledge it, but in my heart I am accusing God of injustice (it’s not fair!) or not caring (if You cared You wouldn’t make me go through this!) or even betrayal (You led me into this situation, You knew how it would turn out, and You didn’t use Your power to stop it!). When I draw back, I don’t want to be near my brothers and sisters in Christ, because I know they will pick up my coldness, fears, and anger. When I am alone and see those things in myself (try as I might not to) I tend to draw still further away from my only hope and help. However, when I refuse that course of isolating myself and confide in the mature friends God has given me, they can pray for me, and help me take my sin to Him. With His help through them, I stop that hot/cold cycle and grow.

Brothers and sisters, God uses trials for many things on the road to maturity. He shows me where (or if) I’m loving Him because He blesses me—and what happens within me when things aren’t going well. When I see where I serve Him for gain, and repent, He strengthens me to say from my heart, “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him,” as Job says in good old King James English. He confronts me with my conditional love for Him and calls me deeper, for He wants me with the help of the Holy Spirit to love Him unconditionally. That is the only way I will get where He wants to ultimately take me. The real question is, will I let Him take me through this process? Will I truly yield to the “instruments of death” (Romans 12:1-2) He has ordained for my life to conform me to His image? The ball is in my court…

Bible Study: A Case for Hope

Friends, as I have been watching and prayerfully listening in the Body of Christ, I have seen something that greatly troubles me. People have been going through some very serious trials. The trials are bigger than we ever thought possible, and some of them are shocking and disheartening because some of us thought as Christians we would avoid such things because we had done our best to follow the Lord both ourselves and with our families. We thought that by following Him we were setting the stage for success, not the trials we are now experiencing. This has tried to erode our confidence in God and His promises as applying to us.

In addition, some of us, depending on the kind of trial are seeing places of past immaturity or other things we have done that have further contributed to what we are going through now. As I pray over this, I am seeing the enemy, Satan, adding to our own thoughts, suggesting that we have no right to God’s promises because we didn’t “follow God correctly.” That’s not what God says.

In view of this, I felt I was to do a study on hope and put it out here on my blog. I pray that as you prayerfully consider the following, the truths of God’s Word strengthen you, encourage you and give you hope.

1 Chron 29:14b-15 14b For all things come from You, And of Your own we have given You.15 For we are aliens and pilgrims before You, As were all our fathers; Our days on earth are as a shadow, and without hope. NKJV

To say v14b about God, and then v15 about ourselves may have been an OT experience, but Jesus has come! Our Savior is here, and knowing Him is to make a difference in our lives! To make it (and even thrive) in these times, we need to continually experience the hope and help of His life, love, and provision.

Ezra 10:2 Shechaniah…spoke up and said to Ezra, "We have trespassed against our God…yet now there is hope in Israel in spite of this. 3 Now therefore, let us make a covenant with our God to put away…” NKJV

The hope we have lies in repenting, or turning to God with our whole being (as opposed to living in guilt and condemnation) and agreeing with Him about what He says our sin is. Oftentimes, and this is very important, what God says our sin is, as well as the remedy He proposes, differs from our view of things. Once we hear His voice, repent and receive His love, grace and forgiveness we can begin acting prayerfully on the actions He guides us into, which will begin to take us back to the path He wants us pursuing. This, according to the Bible, puts us back where hope is alive, because God through Paul says in Rom 8:1 that there is no condemnation to those who walk in Christ Jesus and are led by His Spirit.

Job 6:11 " What strength do I have, that I should hope? NKJV

Our hope is directly proportionate to our strength—they are inextricably tied together. Where does our strength to hope and our reason for hope come from? Nehemiah 8:10 says the joy of the Lord is our strength. What does that mean? His joy is the joy we as His people give Him from our wanting to love and serve Him all the days of our life. His joy is not in a perfectionistic obedience on our part, but in the living, active relationship His actions toward us have made possible. As incomprehensible as it seems, our God takes great joy in us as His people, and our heartfelt repentance and agreement with Him show we are His people.

Now let’s look at the ways in which our confidence is undermined even when we have repented and are listening to and obeying God. The severity of the circumstance can undermine our confidence:

Job 14:18-20 18"But as a mountain falls and crumbles away, And as a rock is moved from its place; 19 As water wears away stones, And as torrents wash away the soil of the earth; So You destroy the hope of man. 20You prevail forever against him, and he passes on; NKJV

Job 19:10-11 10He breaks me down on every side, And I am gone; My hope He has uprooted like a tree. 11He has also kindled His wrath against me, And He counts me as one of His enemies. NKJV

This is the view the enemy wants us to have of God. He wants us to think that God through trials is playing with us and wearing us down, and that He is the destroyer of our hope.

Friends, it is Satan who truly is the enemy.—He’s the enemy of God and the enemy of our souls. The enemy himself works overtime to undermine God. Here the Bible describes the strategy of a future leader who will follow the enemy-note that the slanderous suggestions the enemy brings to our minds and hearts about God is what he inspires his followers to do against God and His people!!

Dan 7:25 He will speak words against the Most High and try to exhaust the holy ones of the Most High. - The Complete Jewish Bible

His strategy is not unlike what we as believers are experiencing today. He first speaks against God’s character, aims and motives. When he gets us considering that, he tries to “wear out” (KJV) or exhaust us with seemingly endless trials. In verse 21, the enemy will “make war against the holy ones” (holy ones are the saints—you and me).

Question: Has war been declared on your family? Your health? Your livelihood? Your marriage? Below is a description of what is really going on in this war from God’s side. This is what Satan wants to prevent—the birth of God’s people into His likeness. Rom 8: 29-30 says

29God knew what he was doing from the very beginning. He decided from the outset to shape the lives of those who love Him along the same lines as the life of His Son. The Son stands first in the line of humanity He restored. We see the original and intended shape of our lives there in Him.- The Message

The following is where we are in the war right now. Thinking again on the subject of hope, note that God subjected everything to futility in hope. Yet also note the statement that it is a fact that creation will be delivered. That fact is not seen yet with the naked eye, but it is first seen through the eyes of God through hope. (Then hope breeds faith. -That’s another study—but I believe it is impossible to have faith without first having hope… . That is why the enemy tries to kill our hope.)

Rom 8:19-20 19 For the earnest expectation of the creation eagerly waits for the revealing of the sons of God. 20 For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it in hope; 21because the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now. 23 Not only that, but we also who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body. 24For we were saved in this hope, but hope that is seen is not hope; for why does one still hope for what he sees? 25But if we hope for what we do not see, we eagerly wait for it with perseverance. - NKJV

If we hope, we wait with anticipation and perseverance. God asked me a question once: “What kind of God am I if I can make plans but do not have the power to see those plans to fruition?”

About ten years into the same trial where He spoke to me above, I was saying that it was just too hard and too long. God reminded me in His still, small voice that even the length of trials is in His control (yes, even when man’s free will is involved!) and that if Job had quit on God when he thought his trial should have been over, he would never have experienced the blessings in the end that God poured out

Those things being said, how do we endure in hope (not just always hang on by a thread)? To quote an old hymn: “My hope is built on nothing less than Jesus’ blood and righteousness. No merit of my own I claim, but wholly lean on Jesus’ name. On Christ the solid Rock I stand; all other ground is sinking sand. His oath, His covenant, His blood, sustain me in the o’erwhelming flood… .” That hymn says it all, friends.

I have to learn to constantly submit the circumstances, the people involved, and myself to the One in Whom I have believed, knowing that He is able to change things (and people, including me) and to keep me from falling. How do I know He is able to keep the things I entrust Him with? I truly know the power of His oath, His covenant and blood. How have I learned this in practice as opposed to in theory, and how do I continue to learn it? By trusting Him and refusing to try to bail myself out.

My faith grows as I wait for Him, seek His strategy and obey Him and watch Him work. Who better to trust? Consider Hebrews 6:13-20a from The Message:

13When God made His promise to Abraham, He backed it to the hilt, putting His own reputation on the line. 14 He said, "I promise that I'll bless you with everything I have — bless and bless and bless!" 15 Abraham stuck it out and got everything that had been promised to him. 16 When people make promises, they guarantee them by appeal to some authority above them so that if there is any question that they'll make good on the promise, the authority will back them up. 17 When God wanted to guarantee His promises, He gave His word, a rock-solid guarantee. - 18 God can't break His word. And because His word cannot change, the promise is likewise unchangeable. We who have run for our very lives to God have every reason to grab the promised hope with both hands and never let go. 19It's an unbreakable spiritual lifeline, reaching past all appearances right to the very presence of God 20a where Jesus, running on ahead of us, has taken up His permanent post as high priest for us… .

But what do we do when we are looking to Jesus with all of our being and still feel like we are barely able to hold on? God’s Word says God has provided for just such an eventuality. Jesus mentioned in John 14 that He would send the Holy Spirit when He went away, and that this would be to our advantage. He would remind us (in a living, applicable, not religious way) of all the things that Jesus spoke. Jesus also called Him the Comforter. Now in Romans 8:26-27 we see His role in our weakness:

26Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses. For we do not know what we should pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered. 27 Now He who searches the hearts knows what the mind of the Spirit is, because He makes intercession for the saints according to the will of God. NKJV

Continuing further, we have God’s promise—He says it cannot fail—He says He’s made sure of that. He says also that since He gave us what we needed most, our Savior Jesus, then He will most certainly give us everything else we need to “make it” in this life with our God (Rom 8:28-32):

28And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. 29For whom He foreknew, He also predestined to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren. 30Moreover whom He predestined, these He also called; whom He called, these He also justified; and whom He justified, these He also glorified. 31What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things? NKJV

Why did God go to such lengths to give us His Word in these areas? Rom 15:4 NKJV tells us: For whatever things were written before were written for our learning, that we through the patience and comfort of the Scriptures might have hope.

Friends, I pray for you what Paul prayed. May the Word fall on good soil and strengthen you. Rom 15:13 Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. NKJV

Catch Up-New Job, New Car-Life's an Adventure!

Hi, Everybody. It is now the middle of summer. As you can see, my last post was in mid-March. That was about the time I was entering the whirlwind, which is just now beginning to settle down, I think. By the way, for those who are interested, I think there will be more of the series "I Will Build My Church," but I got diverted for a time. I'm writing this now to let you know (and to remind myself) that I'm still alive and well.

On March 5th, our hearing aid company, A Hearing Service, transferred ownership and became Accurate Hearing Service. It was a move long expected, as the former owner was ready to retire and travel, and didn't want to work all his life (though I'm sure he still finds plenty of things to do that help other people--he's that kind of a person). But as with many buyouts, the transfer came with many changes. The new company has a different emphasis, and, while I was welcome to stay during the transition, I needed to find a new job.

I was going to be 56 (I just turned so this past week), and that didn't bode too well for my job hunt. -- But God... - What, you say, does that have to do with anything? --I am so glad He does have to do with many things--in my job and in my life. For I believe He has helped me navigate through this time. First, as I prayed, I "heard" (still, small, inaudible but still loud voice) one thing: that I was to "Finish well." That meant I worked in the same place while learning lots of new computer things, etc. Meanwhile, other people who were praying for me "heard" things too. They (more than one person, and they hadn't "compared notes") heard that I didn't have to go out and look for a job, but that God would bring the job to me.

That was all well and good, but I was nervous. After all, my livelihood was at stake! However, that advice did seem to go along with what I'd heard--I was too busy trying to obey God and "finish well" to be able to also look for a job. My final day was to be the last Friday in June.

So what happened? I got a phone call at the beginning of June from family friends. I have known her for over 14 years. For some time they lived down the street from me. Her husband owns a small business, Omega Retirement Plans, Inc. He is an actuary and works with (what else?) retirement plans. His administrative assistant gave notice that she was leaving on June 15th. Would I like to come in and talk? Well, yes, thank you!

The upshot of it is that I was hired and began on June 11. All the upheaval and learning during the transition time in the former job proved to me that I could learn "new tricks," even though I'm not about to call myself an "old dog!" It gave me a confidence that things could work out, even though the new job required a lot of things I'd never done before.

There are several wonderful things about what happened. One is that I work for a boss who is every bit as nice as my brother-in-law. Ron is as patient as Darrell was (and that's hard to find). I am able to learn (and flourish) in a low-pressure but intellectually stimulating environment. I also am now working four days a week instead of five, and bringing home more pay. That is an interesting answer to prayer, for I have felt for some time that I am to spend time developing some other areas of my life that I've needed more time or energy for...and now I'll have it --once I learn my job better and have more brain-power to devote to other things.

One other detail. I haven't had a car since the winter of 2000. It gave up the ghost--I was beginnng to put repair money down a bottomless pit and needed to let go of that "black hole" at the time and just plain save money. The good thing is that I have lived within 15 minutes walking distance from work at all times. In the last year especially, however, I have been prayerful about whether to buy a car. I kept hearing, "Wait." Last January, a couple from church came up to me and told me they felt God wanted them to give me their used 1994 Honda Accord Sedan. I prayed about it, checked it out financially with my children (they know how my finances run because I want them to) and came to the conclusion that I should take it. However, the car needed fixed, and the couple didn't have the money and didn't want to give me a broken car. They prayed, talked to pastor, and put out an email without my knowing it, and people from church contributed so the car could be fixed up for me.

I am now driving a small red car that I love. It got to me in May--just in time to get used to the idea of having "wheels" again--and just in time to be needed to get me about 4 miles to a friend's home so we can go together to work on the other side of town. (She works near where I do.) This is a God-send, because my depth perception is not good and driving in the dark and in rain for a short distance is different from driving all the way across town.

So you see, not only am I alive and well, but so is God and His work both directly and through others in my life. He is always providing. I left one job on Friday, June 8, and started the other on Monday, June 11. I didn't lose one day of pay, and time off started accruing on my first day (for every 10 hours I work, I get one hour of time off). I just pray I will be as much of a help to Ron and Omega Retirement Plans as Ron and Omega are to me.

Well, there's more to talk about, but not today. It's Friday, and I'm going to do some other things on my day off. I'm thrilled I'm beginning to want to study and write again--I've missed these things for the last four months. Have a good day, everyone. 'Bye for now.